The Clean Underwear Shot

When you travel, do you run the daily underwear math like you're prepping for a Mars mission?

If you said “no,” then:

You just casually pack your whole washing machine in your carry-on?

You travel with your own laundry room like some kind of detergent-scented billionaire?

You have a laundry gnome?

Or should I simply congratulate you on whatever magical chaos lifestyle allows you to avoid laundry forever?

Please let me know when you have a chance.

Laundry pun coming…

Or does your world simply unfold in the most logical way?

Does everything proceed logically? I think not. Read on, friend.

Many folks in the automotive and RV industries feel like things will evolve in a straightforward, reasonable, rational, sensible and consistent way. I disagree wholeheartedly.

When there’s a problem, we tend to think in terms of it unfurling logically. For example, we would not expect – nor contemplate – that law enforcement would react to a situation with irrationality. Consider one recent incident in the national news which proves this point.

In November, 2025, Sean Dunn stands charged with a misdemeanor assault for hurling a footlong Subway sandwich into the bulletproof vest of a Customer and Border Protection agent who had been patrolling on the night of August 10.[1]

Prosecutors tried and failed to secure a grand jury indictment of Dunn on a felony assault charge, leaving the misdemeanor case the only option to salvage.[2]

First to the witness stand was the agent who took the sandwich in the chest: Gregory Lairmore. A 23-year veteran of Customs and Border Protection, Lairmore testified that he could feel the impact of the sandwich through his ballistic vest. The sandwich “exploded all over,” he said, and it smelled of onions and mustard.[3]

During cross-examination, Dunn’s defense team pointed to a photograph of what was believed to have been the sandwich—post-impact—that showed it largely intact and still mostly inside its wrapper.

When pressed by the defense for more specificity on the toppings—lettuce? ham? turkey?—Lairmore appeared to hold himself back from laughing but said he absolutely ended up with mustard on his uniform and an onion on his radio antenna.[4]

(Insert snickering here.)

The defense lawyer, Julia Gatto, told jurors in an opening statement. But she added: “You’re not going to be asked if you feel bad for the agent who took a sandwich to the chest. You’re going to be asked whether what happened that night is a federal crime.”[5]

“I could feel it through my ballistic vest,” (the officer) said. He recalled that “it kind of exploded all over” and that he “smelled the onions and the mustard” as the roll came apart. Sabrina Shroff, another lawyer representing Mr. Dunn, pressed Mr. Lairmore on whether the run-in with Mr. Dunn amounted to anything more than a momentary annoyance. She asked Mr. Lairmore about “gag gifts” he has since received at work, including a “plush sandwich” toy that he testified he placed on his desk and a patch reading “felony footlong” that he had also put on display, suggesting even his colleagues saw the incident as a joke.[6]

The jury found Dunn not guilty and he went on with his life.

Could this kind of crazy thing happen at a dealership? Absolutely and I’ve seen it many times.

Don’t assume regulators or police officers or lawyers will act logically. It would be a mistake to assume events will unfold in a logical manner.

I know of one instance – happening right now, at the time I am writing this – a dealer is trying to negotiate a settlement with a regulator. The dealer increased his offer to settle. Instead of the regulator “going down,” they increased the number, going “up” and further from the settlement, instead of moving toward a resolution.

Move Toward Impact-Based Planning

It’s time to move away from probability-based thinking toward impact-based planning. In other words, what would be the impact on your dealership if “such and such” were to happen? (And not just the impact of a sandwich.)

Here are excerpts of the lyrics to a catchy little tune I found on YouTube about a Toyota dealer:

M Toyota, you suck so bad. Turned a hopeful dream into feeling so sad. You treat me like dirt. I'm not your second class with your rudeness and nonsense. It's time to pass…

Long time owner, but you let me down. Thought I'd catch respect, instead I just frown…

…Thought I'd get some love, but I'm just in a hate…

…Pulled up to the light, sunshine on their face, but bad attitudes treated them what a disgrace. Salesman with a smirk. He's on his high horse. They told him their story. He said, "Of course." When they complained, he just laughed for fun and they could kiss his ass. Oh, boy. Here comes a run…

…So I walked out the door with my heart on my sleeve. Never coming back. Can I get a reprieve?

These folks are uncaring. Trust me for your sake. You think it's a service, just a game in disguise. With every appointment, you get hit with a lie. And complacent. They don't give a damn. Just a little advice. Don't be the biggest fan…[7]

When brought to light, these types of complaints reverberate throughout a dealership. I can assure you the day that the employees discovered the song/jingle on YouTube, the dealership employees were distracted, not productive, and off their game.

Regulators Are Very Active

FTC Sees Dismantling of Consumer Watchdog as Growth Opportunity.[8]

The Federal Trade Commission, charged with enforcing consumer protections, is seizing on an opening as the Trump administration dismantles the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau.

That means fintechs, payday lenders, and debt collectors may face greater FTC scrutiny over privacy and accuracy issues even as the bulk of the CFPB’s consumer mandate shrivels.[9]

Maybe it’s time for tabletop exercises? What would you do in different situations? What resources could you bring to bear? How would your insurance policies respond?

Consider Everyday Exposures

Here’s something else to consider: If a customer was walking around the dealership with recording sunglasses, how would that video look? Ray-Ban, Orca, and V1 are a few vendors who are producing these new, documentation devices. And how about AI recorders that people wear around their necks? They record everything they hear and then the devices present written transcripts of the conversations. Do you have a policy about how you will handle customers with these devices? What are they going to see? What are they going to hear? Consider walking around your store with this in mind. Give it some thought. This dirty laundry is at your doorstep right now.

Speaking of laundry, my wife asked me why I was ironing my 4 leaf clover. I told her I was pressing my luck. Don’t press yours!

* * *

1. Wall Street Journal, “D.C. Sandwich Thrower Goes on Trial as Jurors Hear of Mustard and Onions,” November 4, 2025
2. Wall Street Journal, “D.C. Sandwich Thrower Goes on Trial as Jurors Hear of Mustard and Onions,” November 4, 2025
3. Wall Street Journal, “D.C. Sandwich Thrower Goes on Trial as Jurors Hear of Mustard and Onions,” November 4, 2025
4. Wall Street Journal, “D.C. Sandwich Thrower Goes on Trial as Jurors Hear of Mustard and Onions,” November 4, 2025
5. New York Times, “It Smelled of Mustard: Sandwich-Thrower Trial in D.C. Focuses on Moment of Impact,” November 4, 2025
6. New York Times, “It Smelled of Mustard: Sandwich-Thrower Trial in D.C. Focuses on Moment of Impact,” November 4, 2025
7. YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6HChgOK3VNc
8. Bloomberg Law, FTC Sees Dismantling of Consumer Watchdog as Growth Opportunity, September 15, 2025
9. Bloomberg Law, FTC Sees Dismantling of Consumer Watchdog as Growth Opportunity, September 15, 2025